• Faith,  Grief,  Infertility,  Miscarriage

    Grief and Hope

    With our second baby’s should-have-been-due date coming up, I’ve been having more emotional meltdowns lately. Most of the time I can be positive and hopeful, but a lot of the time I still feel anger and bitterness. That’s how grieving has been for me. Even I have a hard time accepting the reality of these conflicting emotions, so it shouldn’t surprise me that many others don’t understand it either. It’s exhausting trying to open up on the hard days. While there are some great people in my life who know how to truly listen, there are just as many who do not. Some ask how I’m doing, but can’t handle…

  • Infertility

    Infertility Is Not Your Fault

    In one of my last posts, I wrote about letting go of the guilt that surrounds infertility. This post is somewhat along the same lines. This week I had an ovarian cyst rupture. It was ridiculously painful, and my poor husband was terrified. It had been nine years since that had last happened, so I forgot how bad it could be. After I realized what was happening, I managed the pain as I’ve learned to do, and made an appointment to be sure everything was okay. By the time I went in for my ultrasound the next day, the pain had greatly subsided. The ultrasound tech confirmed what had happened…